Broken
by TwilightFandamonium
Summary: Set after 3.03. What will happen to Elena after Stefan tells her he doesn't want to be with her?
1. Chapter 1

Damon's car finally pulled up in front of Elena's house. She hadn't spoken the entire ride back from Chicago. She sat with her back to Damon, looking out the window as tears silently fell from her eyes. As soon as Damon stopped the car, the door was open, and Elena was hastily making her way towards her house.

"Elena." Elena stopped, but didn't turn to look at him. "I'm sorry. This is my fault. If he didn't have to save me, none of this would be happening." Elena didn't say anything, and continued walking towards her front door. "He loves you Elena. If there's one thing in this world I'm sure about, it's that. No matter what he said to you, no matter what he does, he still loves you as much as he did in the beginning." Finally, Elena turned towards Damon just a bit and spoke. "I'm not so sure about that anymore." With that, Elena ran the rest of the way into her house and slammed the door behind her.

Elena ran up the stairs, and closed her bedroom door. She rested against it and took a couple deep breaths. Elena crossed the room and picked up a framed picture of her and Stefan. His arms around her, both smiling and so in love with each other. She screamed and threw the picture against the wall, glass shattering all around it. She fell onto her bed, one hand clutching her necklace, heavy sobs over taking her. She cried until she couldn't breathe, until she was dizzy. She cried until the sleep that she had been unable to find for days claimed her.

Damon stood on the front porch of Elena's house, listening to the sounds coming from Elena's room until he was sure she was asleep. He opened the front door and with vampire speed climbed up the stairs that led to the second floor. He quietly opened Elena's bedroom door. He walked over to the shattered glass and looked at the picture she had thrown against the wall in a fit of rage, then walked over to the bed and pulled her comforter up over her. He let out a sigh as he looked down at this poor girl. Silently, he blamed himself for her pain. If Stefan hadn't had to save him, Elena would never be going through this right now. Neither she or Stefan would ever know how sorry he was for making Stefan sacrifice the one person who he had ever truly loved.


	2. Chapter 2

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The next morning, Elena woke in a fog. Her head hurt. "_Why do I feel like this?" _she thought. "_Stefan. He wants nothing to do with me."_ She pulled her comforter over her head and memories assaulted her. The mischievous look in his eye at the lake house as he came into the house and picked her up. Smiles exchanged across the classroom. The Ferries Wheel. Their first time. Appeasing her at the fifties dance. Making dinner for her. The first time he told her he loved her. Mornings waking up next to him. Coming home to her after being in the tomb. Every time she ran into his arms. Their first kiss. Standing on the dock at the lake house. Every time he saved her. During each of those moments he had loved her, but not now, not anymore. The reality that these were now just memories and not her present or her future slammed into her, and she found it hard to breathe. Elena thought back to when she had broken up with Stefan because of Katherine, and how he had cried. This time he walked away from her like it didn't mean anything to him.

She didn't want to be one of those girls who fell apart because of a guy, but Stefan wasn't _just_ a guy. He truly was her everything. Her best friend, her partner, her safety, and her home. In her heart and mind she had truly believed that she and Stefan would get through whatever obstacles life threw at them, and have a long and happy life together. But now she didn't feel safe; physically, emotionally. She used to belong with him. Where did she belong now? She certainly didn't feel complete. Elena realized now how much a part of her Stefan had become, and how much she had taken that for granted. She sat up in her bed and hugged herself as the tears started to fall. Not as bad as the night before, but they were there none the less.

As Elena looked up, she saw the framed photo she had thrown against the wall. She got out of bed and picked it up, glancing over it, her chin quivering. She walked around her room and grabbed every other picture of her and Stefan. She grabbed a shoe box from inside of her closet and dumped the shoes onto the floor. Before she put them inside of the box, Elena took one last look at each picture. Each picture made her feel worse than the one before it, but she wanted one last look at what had been. She went to the other side of her bed and grabbed her journal from under the mattress. That journal contained the best and worst of their moments. Elena threw it into the box like it was a disease. With shaky fingers, Elena released the clasp of the necklace that Stefan had given her almost two years ago. She had worn this everyday since he had given it to her. She knew taking it off was dangerous because of the vervain, but she didn't care. The tears came harder as she dropped the necklace into the box. She closed the box and grabbed a large roll of tape off her dresser. Over and over, she wound the tape around the box, making sure she couldn't get back into it without some work on her part.

This wasn't a teenage girl simply removing evidence of an ex-boyfriend from her life. Elena couldn't survive if she continually had to be reminded of what she had lost. She had been through so much pain in her short life, and this was just too much to bear. She wanted to forget, however impossible it seemed. Forget all of their moments and memories. Forget the moments he loved her, and her love for him. Forget the way his eyes looked at her, the way his lips felt on hers, the way his arms felt around her. She wanted to forget it all, and make this pain go away.

After repeating in her head that she wanted the pain to go away, Elena realized what she had to do.

"Damon?" she called as she walked into the Salvatore boarding house. "Already thought up another plan to get your boyfriend back?" Elena jumped as Damon appeared in front of her. Slowly, Elena shook her head in response to Damon's question. It was her eyes that told Damon everything. "He must have really done a job on you to get you to stop. I never expected you to actually give up." He then noticed that she wasn't wearing her necklace. "Where's your necklace?" "Locked up….for good." Damon rolled his eyes in response. "Stefan gave you that necklace to keep you safe. Really not a good idea for you to take it off in a fit of anger. Do you know what Stefan will do to me if I let something happen to you?" Elena crossed her arms across her chest, becoming irritated. "He made it perfectly clear that he doesn't care anymore. I'm no longer of concern to either of you. You don't have to watch out for me anymore." "Yeah, right." Damon said sarcastically. "Are you really that dumb to believe that my brother doesn't love you anymore? Didn't you hear what I said to you last night? The only reason he's doing this is to keep Klaus from killing you….again."

"Look, you believe what you want, and I'll believe what I want."

Damon walked across the room to pour himself a drink as Elena looked on. "So if your not here on another Stefan rescue mission, then what are you doing here?"

"I'm here because I need your help. I need you to compel me." Damon stopped with the drink raised mid-air. "Excuse me?" Elena brought herself closer to Damon so she was eye to eye with him. "I need you to compel me, like you did to Jeremy. I want to forget….everything. I don't want to have to go on everyday, carrying around these memories. If I can't be with him, then I don't want to remember him. It's too much Damon. If anyone can understand that, it's you. Please Damon."

Damon put down his drink and glared at Elena. "No."

"Why not?" she asked angrily. "Because when Stefan figures out a way to solve this whole Klaus deal, he'll come back, and you two will continue on the way you always have. I know my brother. He's not able to stay away from you."

"You don't know what he said to me."

"It doesn't matter! I know whatever horrible thing he said to you, he didn't mean it. He only said what he felt he had to say to get you to stop following him to keep you away from Klaus. I'm telling you, once this is over with, everything will go back to the way it was."

"You're wrong. If you won't compel me…..then turn me. Make me a vampire. You said once you could turn off your emotions. Well that's what I want. I don't want to feel this way. It's never going to go away. It's going to haunt me. Please Damon, make it stop."

Damon sat Elena down on the couch and sat next to her.

"If this was about me, I'd do it. But once again, Stefan would kill me. You don't mean any of this. So do me a favor. Go home, put on your pretty little necklace, and give it time. It won't be like this forever. I assure you; Stefan will come home to you, groveling like a puppy. Besides, being a vampire doesn't mean you can necessarily stop caring. You saw how I was with Katherine. It's not that simple."

In a huff, Elena rose from her seat and headed to the door. She opened it, but before walking out turned back to Damon. "If you won't help me, then there is one thing I need you to do. Stay away from me. I don't want to see you. Anytime I see you, I think of him, and I can't do that anymore." Elena walked out, slamming the door behind her, leaving a worried Damon behind her.


	3. Chapter 3

I'm sorry this took so long, life has been hectic! I hope you guys enjoy! Feedback is appreciated.

_Hi I'm Elena._

Every time he closed his eyes, she was there.

_Show me how it was done in the fifties._

Open, shut.

_I love you Stefan._

He opened his eyes, took a deep breath, then closed them again.

_I'm not going to give up on you, I believe in you._

Every time he closed his eyes, she was there, loving, supportive, and trusting of him.

_You can take this ring, put it on, and keep fighting. _

He squeezed his eyelids shut, and willed the images to go away.

_I'm gazing…..it's romantic._

He released the breath he was holding and ran his hands through his hair.

_I can't lose the way I feel about you._

He opened his eyes a final time and stared up at the ceiling of the dank motel room he was staying in.

_It's you and me Stefan, always._

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry Elena." he whispered to no one. No matter what had happened, what mistakes he had made, she had always loved him, always trusted him. And now, when she thought he was in trouble, she traveled across the country to save him. And how did he repay her; by ripping out her heart and stomping on it. The look on her face when he told her he didn't want to be with her….she looked like he had just slapped her. Yes, she was putting herself at risk of being found out by Klaus, but couldn't he have done something else, said something else? No matter what actions he had chose in the past, she had never hurt him to make him see clearly. Everything she did, she did with love, compassion, and understanding. But not him. The only way he thought to keep her safe was to lie and hurt her. He was an awful man. No, not a man, a monster. He was a horrible monster.

Now he had sent Elena away thinking he didn't love her. The only shred of sanity he had in this world was his love for her. That's all that was keeping him from truly becoming a monster like Klaus. He hated himself just a little bit more for hurting her, as if she hadn't already been through enough. He couldn't leave things this way, and he couldn't call her and risk Klaus hearing. No, he would write it all down. Every thought he had of her, every feeling he hadn't been able to tell her this summer, he would write it in a journal, and when it was full, he would get it to her. He just hoped that Elena wouldn't give up on him by then.

**ONE WEEK LATER**

That night Elena was sitting by her bedroom window, thinking, as she had been prone to doing these last two months. She hated feeling like this. She hated to be the type of person to feel sorry for herself. She hoped eventually this pain would fade, much like it did after losing her parents and Jenna. She felt so alone. First, she had lost her parents, then Jenna. She _never _thought she would lose Stefan too. She always thought no matter what, they would be together until the end.

_Foolish school girl thoughts._ Elena wondered if this was all that life held for her; a constant series of loss and disappointment. Her friends tried to keep her spirits up, they really did, but watching them with their partners, it was too hard. It was too painful to be reminded that she had lost her partner, her best friend. There was also Matt, who had no one, but every time he looked at her, she just felt like he wanted more. Like, now that Stefan was gone, he could reclaim his place in her life. But he couldn't and she wouldn't let him.

She found it easier to be by herself; just her and her thoughts. She had been thinking about college lately too. It was the perfect reason to get the hell out of this town. Maybe if she could go somewhere where she wasn't reminded of Stefan, her parents, Jenna….

What she needed was a fresh start, and college could provide that, away from Mystic Falls. Alaric had talked to her about it, and told her that he would stay with Jeremy while he completed his senior year next year, and Elena was grateful. But first, she would have to apply for some scholarships, maybe even get a part time job, start saving some money.

Elena was startled by a knock at her door. "I know you don't want to see me, but I wanted to come by, make sure you're okay." Elena nodded her head, and Damon entered her room. She moved her legs and Damon sat on the opposite side of her. "How you doing?" Elena shrugged her shoulders and let her gaze drift to the ceiling before settling on Damon. "How did you, with Katherine, I mean, have you gotten over her?" "I've learned that Katherine is not who I thought she was. It made it easier." Elena hugged her knees to her chest while she watched Damon for any sign that he was lying. He appeared to be telling the truth. "I just can't shut my mind off, I can't stop hearing his voice Damon. You know me, I'm not the mopey type, but I feel like my world has imploded. I just want to make it stop." Damon got up and walked across her room. "Believe me, I know the feeling. Booze helps." he added with an amused expression. Elena rolled her eyes and moved her gaze back to the window. Stefan was out there, somewhere, and while she was sitting here thinking of him, he was with Klaus, continuing to stack up bodies. Damon watched her as she glanced at the outside world, and he knew she was thinking of his brother. Her eyes expressed so much pain. "I know it hurts, but it's only been a week. With time, it will fade, I promise." "Let's hope so." Damon turned to leave, but was stopped by Elena calling his name. "I'm sorry for what I said to you last week." Damon turned around and smirked at her. "I've heard worse." With that he left and closed Elena's door behind him. Elena was alone once more with her thoughts.


End file.
